Pam

Sophie: I wish you had named me something else, I don't like the name Sophie. I feel "Pamish", call me Pam.

Cell phone

Haley: How old will I be when I get a cell phone?
Me: When you are sixteen and start to drive.
Melissa: So if you have a flat tire or something, you can call us.
Me: Or you might be running late.
Melissa: Or you might get lost.
Sophie: Or you might see a buffalo. They are big and mean and hairy!

Freeze tag

Sophie: Mommy! Can we play freeze tag tomorrow?
Melissa: Well, Daddy will be at work and Haley will be at school.
Sophie: Awww, can we play anyway?
Melissa: But if it's just you and me then I would tag you and you'd be fr... Sure, we can play!

Three day old snow

Sophie: Jack and me were eating... Ummm... Jack was eating old yucky snow.
Me: Who was eating old yucky snow?
Sophie: Jack was.
Me: But you said "Jack and me".
Sophie: No, I was going to tell you something else. And then I told you about the snow.
Me: Sophie, did you eat old yucky snow?
Sophie: (shakes her head no)
Me: Sophie, did you eat old yucky snow?
Sophie: Hmph. Yes.

Sissy's lotion

Me: Sophie, what is that all over your hands?
Sophie: Sissy's lotion.
Me: That's gross. Where did you get that?
Sophie: Sissy's bathroom.
Me: Show me.
Sophie: OK... See, there.
Me: That's not lotion, that's glue! You put glue all over your hands?
Sophie: I thought it was lotion.
Me: What did you think when it got all dry and sticky?
Sophie: I dunno.

Ella's daughters

Sophie: Will Ella drive her daughters to school someday, too?
Melissa: I don't know, probably.  
Sophie: Yeah, and she will name one of her daughters Blowfee.

Good mommies

Sophie: When I'm a mommy, I'm going to make cookies with my daughters, too. 
Melissa: Good!
Sophie: Because I'm going to be a good mommy just like you!

Popcorn

Sophie: Grandma Jan knows how to make popcorn.
Me: Yep, I think all adults know how to make popcorn.
Sophie: Well, at first she didn't know how, but then she learned.
Me: Oh, yeah?
Sophie: Yeah. Maybe she learned at popcorn school!

Cookies

Melissa: Ok, now we have to put the cookie dough in the refrigerator.
Sophie: Why?
Melissa: So it can get colder so we can cut out shamrocks.
Sophie: Why?
Melissa: Because the dough has to be cold so you can roll it and cut it out. 
Sophie: Well, you know what they say...
Melissa: No, what do they say?
Sophie: That if you don't put it in the fridge you can just put some water on it.
Melissa: No, they don't say that. That won't work.
Sophie: Oh, OK.

Clock

Haley: We're learning to tell time on a manly clock.
Me: What?
Haley: At school, we're learning to tell time on a manly clock.
Me: What is a manly clock?
Haley: You know, like a clock in the living room.
Me: I think you mean a manual clock. Like a clock with hands?
Haley: Oh, yeah, a manual clock.

Why I always put the seat down and leave the lid up

Sophie: Daddy, I have to go pee-pee and somebody put the toilet lid down!
Me: OK, just put the lid up and go.
Sophie: But I'm running out of time!
Me: Just put the lid up and go!
Sophie: BUT I'M RUNNING OUT OF TIME!
Me: You could have been in there and done by now! Just put the lid up and sit down!
Sophie: AAAAAGGHHH! FINE!

Dates

Haley: Why are we going to Grandma's house?
Melissa: So you guys can stay with Grandma while Daddy and I go on a date.
Haley: Married people don't go on dates. 
Melissa: Yes they do. Mommy and Daddy still like to spend time together, just us. 
Haley: I thought that's what your anniversary is for.

Mustache

Me: Sophie, have you been drinking orange Crystal Light?
Sophie: How can you tell?
Me: Because you have an orange mustache.
Sophie: Yeah, like Crazy Pa-Pa's?
Me: No, his is brown. And made of hair.
Sophie: Made of hair? Why is it made of hair?
Me: Mustaches are made of hair, you know, like whiskers.
Sophie: I know.